A good story has to have certain elements: Wants and needs and fears and whatnot of the character, a goal, a setting, some conflict.
And what is our life but a story told?
Whose ears it is for, we can decide for ourselves. Whose standards it should meet we can decide ourselves, but not always choose. Some of our wants we can decide, some needs we can’t really do anything about. The setting is a whole topic in itself, made of so many variables!
Conflict rises when people don’t see eye to eye and can’t meet each other on common ground.
Goals.
Goaaaaaals.
Gooooooals.
Ugh, hardout stuff those. If you set them, truly, they might become true. If you don’t set them, everything stays the same (there are people who like that idea). The goals to choose from might evolve with every decision we make, but that might just be less daunting than one might imagine.
But I want to talk about the goals most people wouldn’t call goals. Even many neurodivergent people haven’t discovered calling those things goals. We don’t (let ourselves) see that we reach SO MANY goals on a daily basis!
First off, the easy-to-see ones, with their given limitations respectively:
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Work is easy with a clear task, given that it is clear and you can see it positively done each day
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Travel is easy with a clear itinerary, given that it is one that meets your needs (e.g. your own plans)
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Projects are easy with a clear purpose, given that they have a definite finish line
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Living with other people is easy when they make clear what is right to do, given that you trust them fully
But do we only live for Work, for Travel, for Projects, for doing what others like?
Isn’t there a whole area, sometimes feeling like a vacuum, where you find mundane and wonky activities that some do like this and others don’t do and even others have different ideas about their importance altogether?
What is the goal of laundry, of eating healthy, of vacuuming, of doing dishes, of cleaning the sink, of seeing people, of going outside, of education, of sorting stuff, of keeping bugs out?
Just Daily Life.
Drawn to things that are clear, this collection of often literally grey areas feels like a great riddle of life itself, ever-growing and raising more questions as you try to make heads or tails of it.
Surely, all of them were once invented, developed and introduced for good reasons, but those are less prominent than the traditions and mannerisms which were born out of taught behaviour.
As a bottom-up-thinker, I like to understand the Why, but in everyday life, the Why is often obscured behind many layers and conflicting interests.
In the absence of a feasible valid reason, I tend to be latching on to any sense of an activity I see fit, trying to find intermediate purposes that correlate with my personal values and the elements of my own story.
And when there are no great story arches to live through in my story at times, then I like to focus on the smaller ones, which are equally dramatic, satisfying and happiness-bearing in and of themselves!
It is easy to be told what to do. The reason why we do it, is to be happy, ultimately. And to find happiness quickly when not told what to do, in our own time, by our own rules, following a most unique story, that is a power to behold!
